I had never planned to make this particular rant but someone at work set me off this morning. Since I couldn’t spew all this venom at them you all get to enjoy my tantrum **Insert sinister laugh here**
Why is it that every time people find out I’ve been in a relationship with my husband for 15 years the first question that is asked is always in shock and pity…”And you don’t kids?” like something is wrong with me. How dare I haven’t procreated after spending so many years with the same person, we’re failing humanity. It pisses me OFF!
First of all it’s none of your business why I don’t have kids and how dare you feel so comfortable to condemn or judge me. You don’t know anything about me. I choose not to have children but it could also be that I’m unable to have them. I shouldn’t have to explain myself to you. I don’t say things like “Oh wow, you’re pregnant, there goes your freedom” or “Geez, I guess you’re life is over now. Say goodbye to privacy!” to you do I? I happen to enjoy not having a schedule dictated by homework, playdates and soccer practice. I like that I can get up and go whenever I want without worrying about a babysitter or fighting with my husband on why I deserve a break.
I am intrigued about the bond that comes from growing a person in your body but have never felt drawn to it enough to want to do it myself and THAT’S OK. I’m still a woman. Having a child or not having one doesn’t make me any less a person and I’m tired of being treated that way. It’s not only strangers that do this, members of my own family are just as guilty. “When are you having kids?”, “I guess I’ll never be a grandparent at this rate.” Or “I’m not pressuring you but you know.” No I don’t know and thank you for making me feel awkward.
Now don’t get me wrong, I have MANY friends that are parents; amazing parents actually. They have children that are smart and funny, talented like some of us only dreamed we could be but were too afraid to try. They are helping these small people become brilliant big people and I’m in awe that they can do it each day. I think being a parent is a selfless, demanding job with amazing rewards for people that choose to parent. I applaud all of my friends for choosing to be parents and support that choice.
I think that some of the children of this generation and decade are some of the brightest future adults we’ve ever seen. In the same breath I also think some of these kids would benefit from an old fashion ass whoopping. I see WAY too many people trying to be friends with their kids. GUESS WHAT! They have friends, they need parents. Be their friend when they become an adult, be the structure they need in life now.
I’m sure there are those out there that will read this and be very offended….GOOD, I’m offended every time I’m questioned about children. You be you and I’ll be me.