Did you know when you push forth a person from your body or decide to bring a baby into your home a switch is flipped on inside of you that prevents a restful sleep? I didn’t. I don’t think I’ve slept longer than 2-3 hours at a time since Emmie was born. It’s not her fault, well mostly, either! She’ll have those rare nights when she sleeps for a 4-6 hour stretch and I will still catapult out of bed to stare at her monitor just in case.
Of course, there are also those nights I question if the child has ever heard of sleep. Like recently for instance, she’s decided that sleeping in two hour intervals is more productive than not. She’ll be 4 months old in about a week and according to Google and every parenting site I can stalk she’s in a growth spurt/leap/regression stage. Let me tell you, she’s been in one in one way or another since birth! I feel like maybe those sites and message boards were created with the sole purpose to make new moms and dads crazy. Just be straight with me folks, tell me I will not sleep again….EVER!
Being lolled into thinking that if she can just get past this leap/growth/regression we’ll all experience relief is ridiculous! I don’t know who I feel worse for, me or her. She’s doing all the growing, developing and teething and I’m the bystander that can only support her as much as is humanly possible.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining……ok maybe a little but I’m not blaming my baby. I just want to tell new parents the truth. It makes it so much easier to deal with when you finally learn that you shouldn’t expect an end in sight for some time, if ever.
If I hear “sleep when the baby sleeps” one more time I swear to you that I will burn down a building! It sounds nice but honestly when Emmie does sleep I want to use that time to unwind. I want to read or talk with my husband or watch a show scream free. Sleeping is the last thing on my mind. I’m too wired from the 2-4 cups of coffee I’ve had that keep me functioning anymore. If it weren’t for coffee and pop-tarts I think I would enter zombieland forever.
I’m sure in the years to come when she’s sleeping all night and no longer cuddling in bed with me I’ll miss these times but as I’m currently living them I wish for nothing more than at least 4 solid hours of sleep. That includes not startling awake because she hasn’t cried out for me.