I am struggling today.
I was so very excited to spend my daughter’s first Thanksgiving with my sister and by Saturday morning I wished I had just stayed home.
I’m trying to understand the personal attack that my sister thinks was placed on her but I’m really not getting it. I know that my husband and I more than appreciated her cooking and putting everything together.
Here’s what happen. Due to eating the hor d’oeuvres and mimosas my husband got heartburn and was unable to eat during dinner but did take a plate to go. Is that really disrespectful? She felt he should have tried to eat or to take the Tums she offered, despite us telling her that they don’t work for him and usually just make it worse. He still sat at the table, helped me with the baby and interacted with everyone.
Does that really constitute the proclamation that she will no longer be inviting us for family functions anymore and that you don’t plan to attend any either? I’m feeling at this point that no matter what there would have been some criticism and that nothing short of being perfect will ever be good enough.
I’ve been told to let it blow over but I’m tired of doing that with so many things! My thought process is that it’s fine that we won’t be invited to any functions anymore. I don’t want my daughter or my husband to be treated as 2nd class or looked down upon by the perfect people of this world when I have a say in the matter. Remember though, that’s a two way street and we won’t be the ones missing 1st birthdays, sports events and recitals.
The more I think about it, the more the anger boils inside me. I feel rage at my immediate family being treated like shit by a family member! WE ARE FAMILY! That should mean something!
I had to write this down, it’s been sitting in my mind and festering. What was supposed to be a wonderful holiday and possibly a new tradition is now gone. Hurt feelings, on both sides, and negative thoughts now cloud what I consider to be the best holiday of the year.
I’m full of doubt and pain as to whether I should post this or not. I’m not trying to keep the animosity going but I sincerely doubt my sister would ever read this, she probably doesn’t even know I have a blog. I also don’t want to have to get into any argument with her about it should she happen to read it. She was more than clear with her feelings and I made the choice to not respond. That has always been my role. I’m tired of feeling like I should defend my husband and my life to anyone.
As I put my thoughts to paper (MS Word) I feel the weight of this issue leave me and for that I am grateful. I am interested in hearing what you think on the matter. Am I being narrow-minded in not seeing it as my sister does? Is she being narrow-minded in her expectations?