Fair-weather Father


I wasn’t sure if I wanted to bring this up but the more I think about it the more I feel like I need to share it.

stop-shield-traffic-sign-road-sign-39080

For just a little background into this story. I’ve talked before on my blog about my father and our lack of relationship. He made his choices early in my life. Meth was and is more important. Or as he likes to say, “He was born an asshole and will die and asshole.” When I was a kid and he said this it used to bring me to tears. Now, I believe it to be 100% true.

He has no ambition to be a better person, father or human being. I struggled with this for many years and for the most part I’m over it.

I have an amazing mother. She talk me how to be who I am today. I am a strong individual because I was raised by a strong woman.

Over the years I’ve just accepted my father for who he is, or so I thought. I didn’t get angry when I didn’t hear from him when my daughter was born. I called, texted, left a message, all the while in labor. I wasn’t hurt, it was expected. He ended up meeting my daughter 3 months later.

Since then he’s seen her one other time.

So, there’s that story, which leads to short interaction this past weekend.

I got a text from a random number on Friday night around 10pm saying “It has been real good of u to let me get to know my granddaughter thank you with all my heart.”

I immediately knew who sent it and I was pissed!

This from someone I haven’t heard from or seen on 8 months!

I was civil, I replied “What? All you ever have to do is call.” I wanted to say more but I refrained. I should have said what I wanted right then and there. The reply told me as much, he said “I should not have to.”

If I could have jumped through the phone and punched him in the neck, I would have! He doesn’t have to?!?! He doesn’t have to reach out to me, his daughter, in order to get to know his grandchild? Seriously?

My response short but firm and said exactly what I needed to say, well mostly. I said “Really? Don’t play this game with me. You make your own choices. You never reach out. You have no idea what’s going on in my life because it’s not convenient for you. What’s the difference now?”

I’m still waiting on the response.

I should have asked him what his granddaughter’s name was, he has never called her by her name.

I was livid all day, I allowed him to ruin my Sunday and that made me even more upset. This man! Who does he think he is!! I’ve tried in the past to build a relationship but it always felt one-sided, I was never as important as Meth. It’s that simple. He was a fair-weather father and is now nobody.

When the shooting happened and I was thinking of all the people I cared for and wondering if they were safe, he never entered my mind. That says something to me.

My child is not a toy. I made the choice before she was even born, I would not allow anyone to treat her emotions as if they meant nothing. Be it family or friend. If you want to be in her life then be there, if not then don’t be. We don’t need or want you.

Advertisements

Who Has the Power?


pexels-photo-312839

Has there ever been someone in your past or maybe someone in your current life that makes you experience emotion beyond reason?

For example, the sound of their voice or the statements they make cause instance anger, frustration or fury?

Are you able to get past it or are you currently in the middle of it and have no escape from these emotions? Continue reading “Who Has the Power?”

Instead of #WaldoWednesday


I don’t have a theme today for #WaldoWednesday.

I have been dealing with a sick baby all week and lack the brain power this morning to dig too deep into myself.

I guess that’s wrong as well. I am digging deep but I don’t know if a quote from my favorite dead fella will work this morning.

Continue reading “Instead of #WaldoWednesday”

All Aboard the Crazy Train!


I have been a neglectful blogger. I’m just going to babble and rant about what’s been going on in my life in no particular order. Some things will be left out of course because I can’t have them making their way back to Facebook just yet.

I want to keep you all so entertained day after day that I think I overwhelmed myself and then produce nothing. I try to think of things that will be enjoyable for my readers. I know what I enjoy but do you want really hear my opinion of world events and politics? I have very strong feelings about both. Continue reading “All Aboard the Crazy Train!”

#RegisterYourVehicle


I’m not sure if this is a nationwide thing or just something that we’re lucky enough to experience in Nevada only but everyday I’m seeing more and more vehicles with no registration.

wa2013wsuolder

I use the image above because I live in a complex where I have seen the same car for over a year with Washington plates that expired in July 2014 so it seems apt. There is also another car from California that has expired plates from September of 2014. Both woman have claimed that lack the funds to register the cars in state. I find that hard to believe. I have a household where money is extremely tight but we know each year to budget the money for smog and registration.

Here in NV car registration is extremely expensive and the system could use an overhaul but that isn’t an excuse. If you can afford to move here, you can afford to register your car here. It is perceived to me as a blatant slap in the face as a resident of Nevada.

No-More-Excuses

Maybe this shouldn’t bother me but it does, it tells me that the people driving the vehicle has no car insurance. Heaven forbid they’re in an accident, they have no insurance so if they’re at fault they can be sued for all damages. That means they could go bankrupt paying for the other drivers medical bills, car repair, loss of wages, etc when if they had registered they’re car they would have insurance and that would be covered under the policy.

It also annoys me because I was pulled over one day after my stickers expired. I was waiting for the others to come in the mail and sure enough they did that afternoon but I was seen right away by a police officer. I didn’t get a ticket, I had proof of registration so it was fine but where the heck are these cops when I see 5-10 cars on the way home with no plates or expired plates. It seems even worst to me when the plates are out of state. If you choose to move to a new state do some damn research. You know you have to register your car so……WTF?

There is a website in Nevada where you can turn in the people doing this and I have….HERE but as of today the program has been suspended for review by the *2015 Legislature. I don’t care if you think I’m a narc or snitch. I only have one thing to say to that…..GROW UP

Rant over, no applause needed. *Takes a bow*

*I tried looking up a review for the suspension and found nothing so if you do let me know.